What do most men and women say they want from sex? Some combination of pleasure and closeness. But that isn’t what most people focus on during sex.
Instead, most people typically focus on how they look, smell, and sound; obsess on what their partner is thinking; try to manage distracting thoughts & feelings; and most of all, attend to their performance.
That leads exactly to what so many people fear: sexual “dysfunctions” like orgasm, erection, or desire problems. Therapists and self-help books can make things worse, because they’re trying to improve “functioning”—which doesn’t help at all.
Better friction doesn’t give people what they really want from sex: a sense of relaxation, playfulness, self-acceptance, and connection. Erections and lubrication don’t guarantee desire or satisfaction. And so treating people’s genitalia is the wrong approach to enhancing their passion or pleasure.
In this webinar we’ll examine:
- How to help people identify the good reasons they don’t desire or initiate sex
- How people construct self-sabotaging sexual narratives—and how to help couples see and change them
- How to support couples in making the transition from lust-driven sex to adult eroticism
- Why orgasm is not the most important part of sex—and why it matters
- How to help people discover their authentic sexual desires, and how they can share these with a partner
- How to help people understand and discuss their sexual decision-making
- How to guide couples into a model of sexual engagement and satisfaction that does not focus on sexual “function” and “dysfunction.”